My family has never been the kind of family to freak out over a storm. Only on a few occasions have there been storms that made it impossible to get anywhere if you needed something (Hurricane Floyd for one, another tropical storm that resulted in almost every road out of Plainfield being partially or fully flooded). So it was weird that I said to my mom today "We better go to the store now before the storm hits." And I only said that cause it had been a week since we food shopped and contrary to my dads attitude there wasn't enough food in the house if we can't get out till Monday.
So as I stated we never freaked out over a storm so we never jumped in the car and bought food like we were going to have to survive for two weeks. So it was rather interesting being at the grocery store tonight. It was packed more so then normal and people were just done right rude, especially those pushing carts. At one point I am standing off to the side while my mom went ahead because there was no room to squeeze the cart between the people online and the mom and three kids standing at the freezer picking out ice cream. So I was a little dumbfounded when three people decided to forge ahead of me with their carts. I am not the kind to confront people in public (it's just not something you do in Plainfield) but I was really tempted to blurt out "And where the hell do you think you are going to go?" Seriously, has our society dumbed down that much? I like to think of myself as an abstract thinker, it comes from studying psychology, sociology and the like. But I also think 3 dimensionally. If there is no where to go you might as well put it in park and wait for the path to clear....right??
Oh yea, and I backed into a pole today, while I was turned around to see what was behind me. What the hell is it with me and backing into things?? No damage to the car thank god, maybe a little paint transfer. That would have sucked, we are already down to two cars because dads is in the body shop for at least another two weeks.
Friday, December 18, 2009
Saturday, December 12, 2009
Some selections from my favorite Christmas album
"A Baby Just Like You"
The season is upon us now
A time for gifts and giving
And as the year draws to its close
I think about my living
The Christmastime when I was young
The magic and the wonder
But colors dull and candles dim
And dark my standing under
Oh little angel, shining light
You've set my soul to dreaming
You've given back my joy in life
You' ve filled me with new meaning
A savior king was born that day
A baby just like you
And as the Magi came with gifts
I've come with my gift too
That peace on earth fills up your time
That brotherhood surrounds you
That you may know the warmth of love
And wrap it all around you
It's just a wish, a dream I'm told
From days when I was young
Merry Christmas little Zachary
Merry Christmas ev'ryone
Merry Christmas little Zachary
Merry Christmas ev'ryone
"The Peace Carol"
The garment of life, be it tattered and torn
The cloak of the soldier is withered and worn
But what child is this that was poverty-born
The peace of Christmas Day
The branch that bears the bright holly
The dove that rests in yonder tree
The light that shines for all to see
The peace of Christmas Day
The hope that has slumbered for 2000 years
The promise that silenced 1000 fears
A faith that can hobble an ocean of tears
The peace of Christmas Day
The branch that bears the bright holly
The dove that rests in yonder tree
The light that shines for all to see
The peace of Christmas Day
Add all the grief that people may bear
Total the strife, the troubles and care
Put them in columns and leave them right there
The peace of Christmas Day
The branch that bears the bright holly
The dove that rests in yonder tree
The light that shines for all to see
The peace of Christmas Day
The branch that bears the bright holly
The dove that rests in yonder tree
The light that shines for all to see
The peace of Christmas Day
"Noel: Christmas Eve 1913"
A frosty Christmas Eve, when the stars where shining
I traveled for the home, where westward falls the hill
And for many, many a village, in the darkness of the valley
Distant music reached me, peels of bells were ringing.
Then spread my thoughts to olden times, to that first of Christmases
When shepherds who were watching, heard music in the fields
And they sat there and they marveled, and they knew they could not tell
Whether it were angels, or the bright stars a-singing
But to me heard a far, it was starry music
The singing of the angels, the comfort of our Lord
Words of old that come a traveling, by the riches of the times
And I softly listened, as I stood upon the hill
And I softly listened, as I stood upon the hill
"Alfie: The Christmas Tree"
(spoken)
Did you ever hear the story of the Christmas Tree
Who just didn't want to change the show
He liked living in the woods and playing with squirrels
He liked icicles and snow.
He liked wolves and eagles and grizzly bears
And critters and creatures that crawled
Why bugs were some of his very best friends
Spiders and ants and all.
Now that's not to say that he ever looked down
On the vision of twinkling lights
Or on mirrored bubbles and peppermint canes
And a thousand other delights
And he often had dreams of tiny reindeer
And a jolly old man and a sleigh full of toys
And presents and wonderful things
And the story of Christmas Day
Oh, Alfie believed in Christmas all right
He was full of Christmas cheer
All of each and every day
And all throughout the year
To him it was more than a special time
Much more than a special day
It was more than a beautiful story
It was a special kind of way
You see, some folks have never heard a jingle bell ring
And they've never heard of Santa Claus
They've never heard the story of the son of God
And that made Alfie pause.
Did that mean that they'd never know of peace on earth
Or the brotherhood of man
Or know how to love, or know how to give
If they can't...no one can.
You see, life is a very special kind of thing
Not just for a chosen few
But for each and every living breathing thing
Not just me and you
So in your Christmas prayers this year
Alfie asked me if I'd ask you
Say a prayer for the wind, and the water, and the wood
And those who live there, too.
"It's In Every One of Us"
It's In Every one of us to be Wise
Find your heart,
Open up both your eyes.
We can all know everything
Without ever knowing why
It's in every one of us, by and by
It's In Every one of us to be Wise
Find your heart, Open up both your eyes.
We can all know everything
Without ever knowing why
It's in every one of us, by and by
By and by.
"John Denver and The Muppets, A Christmas Together"
The season is upon us now
A time for gifts and giving
And as the year draws to its close
I think about my living
The Christmastime when I was young
The magic and the wonder
But colors dull and candles dim
And dark my standing under
Oh little angel, shining light
You've set my soul to dreaming
You've given back my joy in life
You' ve filled me with new meaning
A savior king was born that day
A baby just like you
And as the Magi came with gifts
I've come with my gift too
That peace on earth fills up your time
That brotherhood surrounds you
That you may know the warmth of love
And wrap it all around you
It's just a wish, a dream I'm told
From days when I was young
Merry Christmas little Zachary
Merry Christmas ev'ryone
Merry Christmas little Zachary
Merry Christmas ev'ryone
"The Peace Carol"
The garment of life, be it tattered and torn
The cloak of the soldier is withered and worn
But what child is this that was poverty-born
The peace of Christmas Day
The branch that bears the bright holly
The dove that rests in yonder tree
The light that shines for all to see
The peace of Christmas Day
The hope that has slumbered for 2000 years
The promise that silenced 1000 fears
A faith that can hobble an ocean of tears
The peace of Christmas Day
The branch that bears the bright holly
The dove that rests in yonder tree
The light that shines for all to see
The peace of Christmas Day
Add all the grief that people may bear
Total the strife, the troubles and care
Put them in columns and leave them right there
The peace of Christmas Day
The branch that bears the bright holly
The dove that rests in yonder tree
The light that shines for all to see
The peace of Christmas Day
The branch that bears the bright holly
The dove that rests in yonder tree
The light that shines for all to see
The peace of Christmas Day
"Noel: Christmas Eve 1913"
A frosty Christmas Eve, when the stars where shining
I traveled for the home, where westward falls the hill
And for many, many a village, in the darkness of the valley
Distant music reached me, peels of bells were ringing.
Then spread my thoughts to olden times, to that first of Christmases
When shepherds who were watching, heard music in the fields
And they sat there and they marveled, and they knew they could not tell
Whether it were angels, or the bright stars a-singing
But to me heard a far, it was starry music
The singing of the angels, the comfort of our Lord
Words of old that come a traveling, by the riches of the times
And I softly listened, as I stood upon the hill
And I softly listened, as I stood upon the hill
"Alfie: The Christmas Tree"
(spoken)
Did you ever hear the story of the Christmas Tree
Who just didn't want to change the show
He liked living in the woods and playing with squirrels
He liked icicles and snow.
He liked wolves and eagles and grizzly bears
And critters and creatures that crawled
Why bugs were some of his very best friends
Spiders and ants and all.
Now that's not to say that he ever looked down
On the vision of twinkling lights
Or on mirrored bubbles and peppermint canes
And a thousand other delights
And he often had dreams of tiny reindeer
And a jolly old man and a sleigh full of toys
And presents and wonderful things
And the story of Christmas Day
Oh, Alfie believed in Christmas all right
He was full of Christmas cheer
All of each and every day
And all throughout the year
To him it was more than a special time
Much more than a special day
It was more than a beautiful story
It was a special kind of way
You see, some folks have never heard a jingle bell ring
And they've never heard of Santa Claus
They've never heard the story of the son of God
And that made Alfie pause.
Did that mean that they'd never know of peace on earth
Or the brotherhood of man
Or know how to love, or know how to give
If they can't...no one can.
You see, life is a very special kind of thing
Not just for a chosen few
But for each and every living breathing thing
Not just me and you
So in your Christmas prayers this year
Alfie asked me if I'd ask you
Say a prayer for the wind, and the water, and the wood
And those who live there, too.
"It's In Every One of Us"
It's In Every one of us to be Wise
Find your heart,
Open up both your eyes.
We can all know everything
Without ever knowing why
It's in every one of us, by and by
It's In Every one of us to be Wise
Find your heart, Open up both your eyes.
We can all know everything
Without ever knowing why
It's in every one of us, by and by
By and by.
"John Denver and The Muppets, A Christmas Together"
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
If God invited us all to a table and told us to put our problems on the table before us and look at everyone's problems, we'd take our own and go home
In the weeks leading up to Thanksgiving I found myself dreading the inevitable question. What are you thankful for? It's not that I don't have things to be thankful for. I think it is just that I had to take a long hard look at my life.
With the cluster fuck that is my extended family these days I didn't think I could be thankful for family. But I think about the people that have welcomed us into their homes over the last couple of weeks and years when my own family choose to turn their backs on us. I realized that blood doesn't necessarily mean family.
I am thankful for friends. I am thankful for those that bother to give two shits. Difficult times are guaranteed to reveal to you one thing...who your real friends are. It is difficult knowing there are those that know I am back home and going through some hard times and haven't bothered to pick up the damn phone. But there are a few that I can count on when it matters.
I am thankful for my health. Even though there are times I look at myself in the mirror and hate what I see physically, I could be suffering from a rare form of cancer like my aunt's sister. But I am not.
And I am thankful for my sister. Without her sometimes I don't know what I would do. Without knowing it she gives me purpose.
With the cluster fuck that is my extended family these days I didn't think I could be thankful for family. But I think about the people that have welcomed us into their homes over the last couple of weeks and years when my own family choose to turn their backs on us. I realized that blood doesn't necessarily mean family.
I am thankful for friends. I am thankful for those that bother to give two shits. Difficult times are guaranteed to reveal to you one thing...who your real friends are. It is difficult knowing there are those that know I am back home and going through some hard times and haven't bothered to pick up the damn phone. But there are a few that I can count on when it matters.
I am thankful for my health. Even though there are times I look at myself in the mirror and hate what I see physically, I could be suffering from a rare form of cancer like my aunt's sister. But I am not.
And I am thankful for my sister. Without her sometimes I don't know what I would do. Without knowing it she gives me purpose.
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
The rollercoaster that is life...
Woke up this morning and didn't feel worse then I did last night but definitely not better. Managed to get up the energy to go run my errands. I leave walmart and am waiting at the light to get on the highway to go to Napa Auto when mom calls. Turns out she got hit by some idiot 19 year old in a mercedes in my dads car. I literally fly home to tell dad and get the registration out of his wallet and then book it to Garwood (not exactly around the corner) to check on her. Car isn't totalled but I had to rehang the bumper with rope tied to the back seat headrest. Mom is OK but it looks like she reinjured her left shoulder which possibly means more PT. It's just on top of everything else mom is more depressed and we all just want a freakin break from reality already!
Monday, November 23, 2009
Less than a week till I am 3 decades old. It doesn't seem like it. I guess it hasn't hit me yet.
Despite what I thought he would do dad e-mailed SUNY Plattsburgh this morning. Actually at this point it might as well be yesterday morning. They informed him they are still doing on campus interviews. WTF?? Five weeks ago he was told a decision would be made by Thanksgiving. Here we are two days from Thanksgiving and they are telling him they are still interviewing. I mean it is good to know that he is still in the running and I am grateful for the somewhat good news but come on already!!
Anyway, I am laying in my bed right now. It is 2:50 in the morning. I am sick which is great. I started to feel a little off late Sunday night and woke up Monday morning feeling like garbage. I am hoping it is just a mild cold that my parents bounced around for about a month and not something worse. I will just keep popping the zicam and hope for the best.
It looks to be a busy few days. Tuesday I have to run to the store, possibly help put a window in and pack up some stuff to take to my sisters. Wednesday I have to work on my car to get ready for the trip, pack some more and help dad if we don't get to the window Tuesday and the weather holds out. Thursday I will pack the car, we are going to dinner at my aunt's sisters house and I will head to Newport from there. I anticipate leaving between 9 and 10 and getting to Newport somewhere between 2 and 3 in the morning. It's not as bad as it sounds. I am a night person anyway and prefer to drive long distances at night when the roads are empty. It will give me some time to think about stuff and reflect on things and talk out loud without someone saying "what did you say". It's weird but I think things through better when I can talk to myself out loud instead of talking to myself in my head.
After this weekend I get to turn my attention toward Christmas and New Year's. I really hope I can find something to do on New Year's Eve. I am sure I will be invited to the Greco's but as much as I love the Greco's I don't enjoy going to their house for get togethers as much as I did. Its probably because now that I am back home I am with my parents every waking minute and the thought of going to a get together with them makes me want to drink myself stupid just a little bit. At the Greco's, no one is my age. They are either ten years younger then me or in their forties and beyond. I really want to find something to do with friends and people my own age. Otherwise I may just sit at home and watch movies by myself. Ok, that was a tad more depressing then I wanted it to be.
Anyway, it's after 3 and I am starting to fall asleep on my keyboard. Here is hoping I sleep well and wake up feeling a little better then I do now.
Despite what I thought he would do dad e-mailed SUNY Plattsburgh this morning. Actually at this point it might as well be yesterday morning. They informed him they are still doing on campus interviews. WTF?? Five weeks ago he was told a decision would be made by Thanksgiving. Here we are two days from Thanksgiving and they are telling him they are still interviewing. I mean it is good to know that he is still in the running and I am grateful for the somewhat good news but come on already!!
Anyway, I am laying in my bed right now. It is 2:50 in the morning. I am sick which is great. I started to feel a little off late Sunday night and woke up Monday morning feeling like garbage. I am hoping it is just a mild cold that my parents bounced around for about a month and not something worse. I will just keep popping the zicam and hope for the best.
It looks to be a busy few days. Tuesday I have to run to the store, possibly help put a window in and pack up some stuff to take to my sisters. Wednesday I have to work on my car to get ready for the trip, pack some more and help dad if we don't get to the window Tuesday and the weather holds out. Thursday I will pack the car, we are going to dinner at my aunt's sisters house and I will head to Newport from there. I anticipate leaving between 9 and 10 and getting to Newport somewhere between 2 and 3 in the morning. It's not as bad as it sounds. I am a night person anyway and prefer to drive long distances at night when the roads are empty. It will give me some time to think about stuff and reflect on things and talk out loud without someone saying "what did you say". It's weird but I think things through better when I can talk to myself out loud instead of talking to myself in my head.
After this weekend I get to turn my attention toward Christmas and New Year's. I really hope I can find something to do on New Year's Eve. I am sure I will be invited to the Greco's but as much as I love the Greco's I don't enjoy going to their house for get togethers as much as I did. Its probably because now that I am back home I am with my parents every waking minute and the thought of going to a get together with them makes me want to drink myself stupid just a little bit. At the Greco's, no one is my age. They are either ten years younger then me or in their forties and beyond. I really want to find something to do with friends and people my own age. Otherwise I may just sit at home and watch movies by myself. Ok, that was a tad more depressing then I wanted it to be.
Anyway, it's after 3 and I am starting to fall asleep on my keyboard. Here is hoping I sleep well and wake up feeling a little better then I do now.
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
Not much going on lately. For some reason I am a lot calmer then I was just a few short days ago. I still have some things on my mind that are taking up a lot of my thoughts but...I don't know. It's like I came to an understanding mentally that I can wait for what I want. I firmly believe that God has a plan for me and I know that all things are in his time. So for now I will be patient not matter how badly I want it.
What I am having a problem being patient with is my dad. It has been what now, three weeks (??), and no call. They said they wanted to hire someone by Thanksgiving which is in a week. So they still have a week but damn I wish they would call already. I really want him to get this job, partly because it will mean good things for my family and partly for selfish reasons. Little by little my dad is becoming more intolerable because of his attitude and depression. I know he is anxious to know if he got the job but as usual he takes it out on the wrong people. He always has and unfortunately he probably always will. I also don't even want to think about what Christmas will be like if he doesn't get the job and Kate doesn't come home or we don't go see her, etc. I need this Christmas to be happy because I didn't enjoy it last year. At least tier 3 unemployment has been approved and my mom was smart with her last few unemployment checks and will qualify for the extension. At least that'll mean there will be money to pay for Christmas (sounds shallow I know).
Mom was sworn in Tuesday as a CASA volunteer. It was a nice ceremony and I got the opportunity to learn a little about the organization. It seems like something I could do at some point but not right now when I am going to go back to school and have decided I am going to need to get a part time job after the first of the year.
Speaking of the first of the year, I have started giving some thought to what my resoulution('s) are going to be. I am not going to go with the stereotypical crap (get active, eat better, etc.). The get active part I am trying to do now anyway. One thing I want in the new year that I have never had is a date on Valentine's Day. Seems small but I have come to realize it is the little things that matter the most.
Anyway, Newport in a little over a week away. I am thinking about driving up late Thursday night depending on what time we get home from Thanksgiving dinner, if we go out. I know it will be a fun weekend but I am keeping my fingers crossed for a good birthday since it is a milestone and the first time I will be able to actually celebrate my birthday in a few years.
What I am having a problem being patient with is my dad. It has been what now, three weeks (??), and no call. They said they wanted to hire someone by Thanksgiving which is in a week. So they still have a week but damn I wish they would call already. I really want him to get this job, partly because it will mean good things for my family and partly for selfish reasons. Little by little my dad is becoming more intolerable because of his attitude and depression. I know he is anxious to know if he got the job but as usual he takes it out on the wrong people. He always has and unfortunately he probably always will. I also don't even want to think about what Christmas will be like if he doesn't get the job and Kate doesn't come home or we don't go see her, etc. I need this Christmas to be happy because I didn't enjoy it last year. At least tier 3 unemployment has been approved and my mom was smart with her last few unemployment checks and will qualify for the extension. At least that'll mean there will be money to pay for Christmas (sounds shallow I know).
Mom was sworn in Tuesday as a CASA volunteer. It was a nice ceremony and I got the opportunity to learn a little about the organization. It seems like something I could do at some point but not right now when I am going to go back to school and have decided I am going to need to get a part time job after the first of the year.
Speaking of the first of the year, I have started giving some thought to what my resoulution('s) are going to be. I am not going to go with the stereotypical crap (get active, eat better, etc.). The get active part I am trying to do now anyway. One thing I want in the new year that I have never had is a date on Valentine's Day. Seems small but I have come to realize it is the little things that matter the most.
Anyway, Newport in a little over a week away. I am thinking about driving up late Thursday night depending on what time we get home from Thanksgiving dinner, if we go out. I know it will be a fun weekend but I am keeping my fingers crossed for a good birthday since it is a milestone and the first time I will be able to actually celebrate my birthday in a few years.
Friday, November 13, 2009
101 Things About Me
I am going to live forever.
I am not as strong as I think some people think I am.
I hate drama even though I sometimes get dragged into it.
I am scared of being rejected, which is probably why I have been single for so long.
I want to have a family.
I worry that I will be alone forever.
I am addicted to paintball.
I don't have much but like to give/buy for others when I can.
I love Christmas. I wish it lasted more then a day.
I value my rights and will fight for them if I have to.
I will fight for those I love.
I want to have a country home or a cabin someday.
I know how to shoot so don't piss me off :-P.
I could probably survive longer then most in a survival situation.
I know how to change/rotate tires, change oil, replace an exhaust, install most aftermarket electronics and do general maintenance on my car. Its just sometime I choose to pay someone else to do it.
I am obsessed with WWII history.
I am probably going to go back to school.
I like bourbon and irish whiskey.
I LOVE the shore. If I could build my home in the country and be an hour drive from the shore I would be set!
My favorite color is green.
I like to cuddle.
I am the quintessential “Jack of all trades, master of none.”
I have been to Russia and would like to go back someday.
I would like to travel across the U.S. And Canada.
I am a total sci-fi geek, I just don't go to conventions.
I have never done drugs and don't plan on and I don't think less of people that do. I just don't like when people try to get me to try it.
I admit when I am wrong. Not right away but I usually pretty quickly realize I was stupid.
I value peoples help. Sometimes I just don't have the answers or know what I am doing.
I like to drive especially at night when no one is on the road.
I love dogs.
I have been in loved but never loved.
I am very aware of my appearance and it holds me back.
I like photography.
I would love to play the guitar but I just don't have the patience.
I love football, and no not soccer.
I like most music (metal, rock, country, folk, old school rap, ska).
I am fiercely loyal.
I have a stubborn streak; it comes from being Irish, Italian, German and Greek.
I have dimples, you just need to get me to smile to see them.
I am very guarded, I don't open up easily.
I love Newport.
I love camp.
I believe in God but I wonder what happens after death.
I need a fan to sleep.
I have worked at a summer camp for 12 summers.
I have lived in NJ all my life but I have also spent time in NH and PA. I have also been to NY, CT, MA, RI, VA, MD, NC, FL and CA.
I have owned 5 cars so far and driven at least 5 dozen other cars.
I value family even though most of my family have distanced themselves from the rest of us.
While I hate losing friends, I see friendship as a two way street. Both people have to want the friendship to survive.
I have tried to deny it but I am a typical guy. I say stupid things without realizing it or thinking before I speak. But I am quick to correct my mistake.
My wardrobe consists mostly of jeans and t-shirts. I do like to dress up but I am most comfortable in jeans and t-shirts. I'd dress up more if I could afford the clothes I like.
I do fancy myself a bit of a country boy. I like trucks, boots, cowboy hats, big belt buckles and country music.
I wish I could live off the grid every once in awhile.
I like to travel by train.
I do not like hypocrites and people that expect more from me then themselves.
I have this strong drive to help people anyway I can.
I hate yardwork.
I despise slow computers and computers that freeze up with a passion.
I always go for the underdog, which is why I like the Giants and Dodge cars and trucks.
Small things tend to baffle me. Like why is it that dishwashers are designed so one bowl can take up the next three dish spaces?
I believe in love at first sight, although more likely it is lust.
I have flown an airplane.
I hate that things have more control over me then I have myself.
I love Bruce Springsteen concerts.
My favorite bars are the Beach Bar, the Beachcomber and Boomers.
I can sit on a beach for hours and watch the ocean.
I want to drive the Trans-Canada and Dalton Highway's.
I once took an overnight train trip and would love to do it again.
I like to drive fast, not like 20+ over the limit, maybe 9 or 10 over.
I can watch reruns of Scrubs over and over again.
I am a car fanatic.
I hate cities. I don't even like to go visit them.
I have never had much luck with relationships. I can never seem to find anyone that wants to give a relationship a shot.
I hate the heat.
My favorite seasons are fall and mid spring through early summer.
I am not a morning person. I prefer late nights.
I was on a fire department in college and actually held the rank of second lieutenant and captain. Sometimes I think about going back into the fire service.
I used to write a lot and I have been told I am a good writer.
I like lightning storms.
I used to love the water but somewhere along the line I stopped liking it.
Someday I want to be able to do something for my parents to really thank them for all they gave up to make for my sister and I.
I tried to learn the bagpipes once but again I don't have the patience to learn an instrument.
I want to learn to ride a motorcycle.
I love watches.
I don't really like amusement park rides.
I hate big bridges.
People seem to trust me but it takes me awhile to trust people.
I am always trying to learn new things.
I have never been really good at video games. Probably because I don't play a lot.
I wish I could open up more easily about whats going on inside me.
I hate clutter even though sometimes it may not seem like it.
I have been working a job of some kind since I was 10.
I try to put my all in everything I do.
I hate feeling unappreciated but then again who does.
I don't understand how people can make mistake after mistake and come out smelling like a rose but yet I fly pretty straight and can't catch a break.
I hate Hollywood. I mean the immorality that comes out of it.
I don't like the direction the country is going in.
I love lighthouses.
I hate cell phones even though I couldn't see life without them.
I love to sit in front of a roaring fire.
I love songs that I can relate to my own life.
I have written research papers in less time than it took to write this list! Everyone should do this at some point. You can learn so much about yourself. I hope this gives you a glimpse into who I am.
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